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‘Don’t let employers try to bully you into being someone you aren’t’: Former hotel worker says he quit after managers asked him to change his appearance

‘My two week notice was in their mailbox the next morning.’


Alexandra Samuels


A former hotel supervisor says he quit after managers tried to get him to change his appearance.

The video of the interaction—and subsequent quitting—was chronicled by TikToker @threebeesinacup (Three), who stitched a TikTok video from @coach2elevate. In his video, Three responds to the question: “What’s the most toxic thing a leader at your company has ever said to you?” 


#stitch with @coach2elevate my two week notice was in their mailbox the next morning. #fyp #worklife #workplaceproblems #foryou

♬ original sound – Three⭐️

Three prefaces his video by saying he was hired while sporting unnaturally colored hair and facial piercings. Still, he says the hotel he was hired at said his appearance was “no problem.”

A year later—and following a promotion to a supervisory role—Three says two women from the company’s management team pulled him aside and told him that he should essentially change his appearance.

“They proceed to say, ‘Oh, we absolutely love the way that you do your job. You are great with guests; we don’t want any of that to change,” Three recalls. But, Three continues, the women reportedly told him that his makeup and facial piercings were “a bit much.” 

Three says he refused to alter his appearance, and, in a follow-up video, claims that he quit shortly thereafter. 

“They did this in the middle of a staffing crisis and thought, ‘Yeah, this is the hill we want to die on right now,’” Three says.

In his second video, Three says a number of people were already leaving the company. “They only care about money. They don’t care about people at all. Fuck them.”

“Dont let employers try to bully you into being someone you arent,” he encouraged in the caption.

It’s not clear from either video which hotel Three worked at. Still, several commenters jumped to his defense and said they supported his decision to leave. 

“Sounds about right with toxic management,” one user wrote. “And [by the way], you look amazing, love.”

“I don’t understand how dyed hair is considered unprofessional,” another comment reads.

Other viewers shared similar experiences they’ve had in the workplace. 

“I had bright purple hair for a year and then the company got bought out,” another TikToker wrote. “Tried to make me dye it natural, so I walked.”

While not divulging his past employer, Three encourages TikTokers to never change their appearance for a job. In a pinned comment to his first video he wrote: “Y’all, we don’t have to live in a corporate hellscape where the employers dictate how you present yourself. You as a person are worth more than that. Normalize self-expression and diversity in all ways in the workplace.”

The Daily Dot has reached out to Three via TikTok comment.

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