- West Virginia corrections employees suspended after Nazi salute photo surfaces Thursday 8:02 PM
- Here are the 15 best Eddie Murphy movies available to stream Thursday 7:56 PM
- Ex-InfoWars video editor admits to making up Islamophobic stories Thursday 6:55 PM
- WhatsApp accounts deleted amid Kashmir internet blackout Thursday 6:21 PM
- Guy gets mocked for tattoo of Baby Yoda drinking White Claw Thursday 6:18 PM
- Spotify Wrapped has people asking just how much it knows about us Thursday 5:50 PM
- Instagram account allegedly asked for inappropriate photos of children Thursday 5:16 PM
- How to stream ‘Boys vs. Bears on Thursday Night Football Thursday 4:33 PM
- Woman caught her boyfriend cheating through his Fitbit Thursday 4:29 PM
- The Pete Buttigieg ‘High Hopes’ dance was designed by an intern Thursday 4:17 PM
- TikTok admits to hiding content made by fat, LGBTQ, and disabled users Thursday 3:58 PM
- ‘Merry Happy Whatever’ is an unoriginal sitcom with plenty of holiday cheer Thursday 3:55 PM
- The ‘Pod Save America’ Bros are losing it over Joe Biden’s newest ad Thursday 3:28 PM
- Van Halen had a wholesome response in defense of Billie Eilish Thursday 3:15 PM
- Influencer faces wrath of K-pop fans after her son played with penis-shaped soap Thursday 1:27 PM
Meet Brian Robinson, NYC’s subway pick-up artist
Men: If you want your testicles to stay un-kicked, I recommend not listening to Brian Robinson.
How’s your long weekend going? Good? Relaxing? Are you enjoying your Columbus Day/anti–Columbus Day? Well, you won’t be for long after you rest your eyes upon the visage of Brian Robinson, a 48-year-old man who claims he can teach men to pick up any woman they want on the subway.
— New York Post (@nypost) October 13, 2014
Brian has lived in New York City for 14 years. During that time, he claims to have picked up hundreds of women on the subway, using such tactics as those he described to the New York Post below:
Robinson’s time-tested approach is to pretend he’s lost and ask for directions.
“I would always say, ‘Is this local or express?’ and then say, ‘I hear an accent: Where are you from?’ It’s an awesome door-opener—97 percent of all NYC women are from someplace else,” he said.
“No matter what place she says, say, ‘Wow, I’ve always wanted to visit your country/city, etc. … do you have email?’” Robinson suggested.
If you’re a man in New York City, you might be thinking to yourself: “Hey, that sounds relatively benign. Maybe this dude is on to something.” But as a woman in New York City, who either bears witness to or directly interacts with subway creepers on a regular basis, let me tell you that he is not.
Take a look at the ellipsis between those two clauses in Robinson’s pick-up statement. From a woman’s perspective, this is what that ellipsis sounds like: “Wow, I’ve always wanted to visit your country/city, etc., and I’d like to surgically remove your rear end from your body and wear it as a fancy Sunday hat while parading around Fifth Avenue. Do you have email?”
See what I’m saying? It’s just not gonna work.
Shockingly, Robinson claims to have picked up nearly 500 women using this strategy. He’s so confident in the strength of his advice that he’s even penning a book on his pickup tactics, How to Meet Women on the Subway.
But a strong word of caution to the men of New York City: Please do not try this IRL. Leave us alone.
Let us read our book or play 2048 or listen to our NPR podcast or whatever we’re doing until we have to get off at our stop. If you wanna smile at us, if you wanna take your chances by waving at us or saying hello, fine. But if you want your testicles to remain un-kicked and intact, I strongly recommend against taking Robinson’s advice to heart.
H/T Gothamist | Screengrab via BriancRobinson/YouTube
EJ Dickson is a writer and editor who primarily covers sex, dating, and relationships, with a special focus on the intersection of intimacy and technology. She served as the Daily Dot’s IRL editor from January 2014 to July 2015. Her work has since appeared in the New York Times, Rolling Stone, Mic, Bustle, Romper, and Men’s Health.