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The theory that Beyoncé may have a secret Snapchat account is both incredible and (tragically) improbable.
Let's back up a bit. The Fader reported on Saturday that Beyoncé's mother Tina Knowles posted a video that had her face swapped in with Beyoncé. In the video, Queen Bey raps "The Message" by Grandmaster Flash.
It's a disarming but addictive visual that you'll probably watch a dozen times today before sending the link off to all your friends and family:The Fader and other outlets concluded that this means Beyoncé must have a secret Snapchat, which she used to apply the faceswap lens on the video. This is an earth-shattering revelation among those in the Beyhive. The very concept of Beyoncé—the arbiter of all that is cool and good about the universe—being on Snapchat, a social media platform that your 15-year old brother uses to send photos of himself vomiting rainbows is...stunning.
It's also pretty unlikely. Why? Because it's obvious that the internet needs Beyoncé more than the songstress will ever need the internet.
Case in point: Queen Bey has 14.5 million followers on Twitter but has only tweeted nine times over the course of seven years. She also has roughly 81 million followers on Instagram and 65 million fans on Facebook; an obscenely large following given she's about as active as Mount Fuji on those platforms. Her tweets are slightly less rare than a category eight earthquake but have the seismic force of roughly the same scale. To her fans, Beyoncé's tweets are occasions memorable enough to compete with Christmas, Hannukah, Eid, most other federal holidays, and even your own birthday.
Do you remember where you were when Beyoncé tweeted this back in 2012? I do.
Beyoncé is more active on Instagram, where she'll casually post something about once a week that will easily become the most incredible thing you've seen all year. Entire populations of major cities will promptly like an image of Beyoncé getting henna applied to her hands or the back of Beyoncé's head at the Super Bowl.The point being, Queen Bey is casual about social media because of the following reasons: 1) She's busy slaying all day, 2) She'd probably be, like anyone else, bored by constant reminders of how awesome she is, and 3) Who needs 134,329,343 notifications from Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, etc., blowing up your phone every hour?
Being the holder of a secret Snapchat account is the type of non-casual social media behavior that Beyoncé is too cool to comprehend. It's hard to imagine the term "secret Snapchat" falling from Queen Bey's lips, unless it's to say "Why does Drake keep bothering me about following him on his secret Snapchat?"
There are also a myriad of other non-Snapchat apps like MSQRD and Face Swap Live that allow users to faceswap without the aid of Snapchat.
Also, Tina Knowles insists in the faceswap video's caption that Snapchat had no role in its creation. “No Snapchat!! Seriously !!," Knowles wrote in the caption.
In conclusion, Beyoncé's mom has no reason to lie to you.