🔍 The 10 dumbest conspiracy theories of 2024

6:00 AM CST on December 24, 2024

This list appeared first in the Daily Dot’s newsletter web_crawlr. Every other week, our reporter Mikael Thalen debunks conspiracy theories swirling online in his “One Dumb Conspiracy” column. If you want to see more content like this before everyone else, sign up for the newsletter here.

⮩ 👁️ 10) Jay Leno’s Illuminati ritual injury

While the Illuminati doesn’t get quite as much attention as it once did in conspiratorial circles, the secret society managed to find relevancy in November when former late night host Jay Leno was severely injured.

Essentially, Leno fell down a steep hill and banged himself up pretty bad. He was left with some pretty significant bruising to his face that even forced him to temporarily wear an eye patch. But in the world of conspiracy theories, Leno’s injury was suspicious.

Ultimately, conspiracy theorists decided that Leno had been beaten up by the mob, or that the government was trying to kill him, or that he had “panda eyes.”

What are panda eyes, you ask? Well, when any celebrity gets a bruise over their eye, conspiracy theorists believe that it means they just went through a secret illuminati initiation ritual.

⮩ 💦 9) Hawk Tuah girl: CIA plant

Hailey Welch, known online as the “Hawk Tuah Girl,” is probably the last person you’d think would get caught up by conspiracy theories. But it’s 2024, and nothing can be normal.

If you recall, Welch became famous after discussing, shall we say, her technique for a certain adult activity. Conspiracy theorists, however, didn’t want to believe that something so simple could produce such fame, despite the internet constantly giving us hundreds of examples.

So the only logical conclusion, according to conspiracy theorists, was that the Hawk Tuah Girl was planted into popular culture by the CIA. Why? To destroy society, or something.

“Don’t be mean to her, as this is not her fault,” one social media user said of Welch. “They are purposely filling our culture with degeneracy to keep the population controlled, weak, and unhappy.”

⮩ 💩 8) Joe Biden can’t stop pooping his pants

Yes, President Joe Biden is old. But does that mean Biden’s constantly pooping his pants? No. Is there any actual evidence that he’s pooped his pants while in office? Also, no.

Nevertheless, claims that Biden has soiled himself followed him throughout 2024 by people who clearly had too much time on their hands. One example came in June when Biden was attending a ceremony for the 80th anniversary of the D-Day invasion in France. At one point, he struggled for a moment to sit down in a chair. Not long after, he and his wife Jill left the ceremony.

That alone was enough to convince poop truthers that Biden was being escorted away by his wife to be cleaned up in a nearby bathroom. And this is why we can’t have nice things.

⮩ 💣 7) Tucker Carlson thinks demons invented nukes

The history of atomic energy and nuclear weapons is well documented. All you have to do is pick up a reputable history book.

But according to ex-Fox News host Tucker Carlson, no one actually knows when nuclear technology was discovered. Therefore, it must be demons.

You read that correctly. Carlson made the unhinged claim in November during an interview.

“I’ve never met a person who can isolate the moment where nuclear technology became known to man,” Carlson said. “So where did it come from exactly? It’s very clear to me that these are demonic.”

If Carlson has never met anyone who could explain even the most basic aspects of nuclear history, maybe that says more about him than it does about those demons he’s blaming.

⮩ 🛰️ 6) Elon Musk’s satellites stole the election

We can’t give right-wingers all the blame. Some liberals got in on the conspiracy nonsense this year as well when they alleged that the 2024 presidential election was stolen.

In fact, they claimed that Elon Musk’s Starlink satellites somehow altered votes. Of course, there wasn’t any evidence for the claim. And from a technical standpoint, the entire allegation made about zero sense.

Perhaps the saddest part of the conspiracy theory, though, was that it wasn’t even original. During the 2020 election, conservatives, including high-level supporters of Trump, conjured up a conspiracy theory that Italian satellites were used to steal votes.

For the record, Trump won the 2016 election. Biden won the 2020 election. And Trump won the 2024 election. There was no widespread funny business.

⮩ 🍔 5) Trump framed with McDonald’s E. coli outbreak

If you remember, Trump visited a McDonald’s this year to perform a publicity stunt. Not long after he was filmed putting the fries in the bag, an E. Coli outbreak was linked to the fast food chain.

Naturally, Trump supporters immediately believed that the outbreak never actually happened. Or that E. Coli was planted in McDonald’s products in order to make Trump look bad. A false flag, if you will.

Of course, none of the conspiracy theories made any sense. And 12 seconds of research showed that the first case of E. Coli, which was linked to McDonald’s Quarter Pounders, was detected weeks before Trump showed up at the burger joint.

But for the conspiracy-minded, nothing is ever as it seems. So everything must be a conspiracy theory.

⮩ 🌀 4) MTG blames hurricanes on the government

Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-Ga.) gets really offended if you dare call her a conspiracy theorist. Yet it seems she can’t even go two weeks without uttering the most incoherent nonsense regarding modern politics.

In October, she unveiled a new, updated version of her previous Jewish space lasers claim by suggesting that the Biden administration caused Hurricane Helene.

The Category 4 hurricane wrought destruction across states such as Florida, Georgia, South Carolina, and North Carolina. Amid the devastation, Greene randomly posted to X to let her followers know that “they” could control the weather. It’s unclear who exactly “they” are.

“Yes they can control the weather,” she wrote on X. “It’s ridiculous for anyone to lie and say it can’t be done.” Of course, spraying some salt in a cloud to make it rain isn’t the same as producing a massive hurricane that creates 140mph winds while dumping 40 trillion gallons of water from the heavens.

But we can’t let pesky things like facts, science, and reality get in the way of Greene’s silly stories.

⮩ 👂 3) Harris and the secret earpiece earring

During the only debate held between Trump and Democratic presidential nominee Kamala Harris, conspiracy theorists once again couldn’t help themselves.

While arguments over who performed better were largely partisan, conspiracy theorists, particularly those obsessed with QAnon, suggested that Harris only managed to stand her ground against Trump because she had a secret team of people in her ear.

And I don’t mean figuratively. They genuinely believed Harris was wearing a secret earpiece, hidden inside an earring, in order to be coached through the debate. Just about every major conspiracy theorist ran with the claim.

As is nearly always the case, it turned out to be total nonsense. The earrings had been worn by Harris repeatedly in the past and were produced by Tiffany & Co.

⮩ 👀 2) Trump staged assassination attempt

Perhaps the biggest left-wing conspiracy theory of 2024 was that Trump allowed himself to be shot in order to boost his popularity ahead of the election.

Trump’s triumphant fist raise following the attempted assassination against him was apparently too cool for liberals to accept, and therefore it must have been pre-planned. Even to this day, many remain convinced that Trump either allowed someone to shoot a gun almost directly at his face or that there wasn’t a shooting at all.

People also obsessed over the fact that Trump’s ear wasn’t blown clean off, even though projectiles don’t always behave like you see in the movies.

In reality, the incident was simply crazy given just how close the bullet came. But all the credible and tangible evidence shows the shooting was real.

⮩ 🐶 1) They’re eating the dogs, they’re eating the cats

I think we can agree that the most pervasive and insane conspiracy theory of 2024 surrounded the right-wing belief that illegal immigrants from Haiti were eating’s people’s dogs and cats in Springfield, Ohio.

As is often the case, the claim first arose on Facebook. No evidence was provided, and the claim came from, according to the lady who posted it, “an acquaintance of a friend” who learned about the incident from “a source.”

Very reliable.

From there, conservatives did everything they could to find proof of cat eating. Fake videos, clips from other locations, including those from other countries, were cited as proof. A photo of an unnamed Black man holding a goose was even used as proof that cats were being eaten.

Of course, the absurd claim went mega viral when Trump echoed it to the world. Even Vice-president elect JD Vance pointed to a police report about a missing cat as proof, even though the cat’s owner later admitted when contacted by journalists that her cat had simply run away and come back.

It was easily the dumbest conspiracy theory of 2024.

The Daily Dot looks back at the year that was in our 2024 Year in Review.

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