Toronto metal band Witchrot is no more, and ironically enough, the band’s breakup may be its best work yet.
Just one month after the female-fronted doom metal stoner band debuted its first EP, band member Peter Turik pulled the plug after he learned “the unfortunate reality of our guitarist fucking my girlfriend.” Unfortunately, the band couldn’t outlive the affair, although Turik is sure Witchrot will continue “in another space and time.”
“Due to the unfortunate reality of our guitarist fucking my girlfriend of almost 7 years WITCHROT will be taking an extended hiatus,” Turik announced. “I however will continue the band in another space and time, being ripe with hate the music is slowly flowing and without a doubt will become the most devastating, torturous music I have ever created.”
For good measure, he even threw in a photo of a broken guitar in trash, and the small fact that “our drummer died.” Yikes! (For the record, the drummer’s death appears to be a nod to Spinal Tap.)
It didn’t take long for Witchrot to go viral on Twitter, with the band’s breakup quickly hailed as the internet’s “favorite band breakup notice ever.”
This is my favorite band break-up notice ever. pic.twitter.com/WsIq1i2d6p— Conor Sullivan (@conortheconor) November 26, 2018
The accompanying picture of a smashed guitar in the trash is the icing on the cake. pic.twitter.com/wCutl7CJSD— Conor Sullivan (@conortheconor) November 26, 2018
there is a turn and a new possibility at the end of every sentence— Hanif Abdurraqib (@NifMuhammad) November 27, 2018
this should be taught in writing workshops https://t.co/OFptxKQaBd
Theres so many layers to this https://t.co/M3OmYulVTp— [cauldron bubbling] (@foulichor) November 27, 2018
Rip Torn has outlived the Toronto hard rock band Witchrot. https://t.co/YDlfQPezri— Rip Torn Outlives (@RipTornOutlives) November 26, 2018
Screw it, we're MouseRat now!!!— I Take No Responsibility At All (@RiddickTNT) November 27, 2018
Some Twitter users missed the Spinal Tap reference and thought the band’s drummer actually died.
good lord. rough week for the Witchrot boys https://t.co/UbfDR1HS8L— kellen (@keltronix) November 27, 2018
I want to know what happened to the drummer.— Beached Individual (@magneticksara) November 27, 2018
… also our drummer died.— Grateful Dad (@rorshach1984) November 27, 2018
That’s terribly tragic, but that had me rolling. Hahaha
Even Ted Cruz is getting wrapped up into Witchrot’s saga.
His smile says, "I've been fucking the Witchrot guy's girlfriend. Also I just farted." https://t.co/UEw2QNPsOD— Deuce Bigalow: Pet Detective (@mikeIVXX) November 27, 2018
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Witchrot may be gone, but don’t worry, Turik is still making music. His band Crazy Bones is still kicking, where he plays guitar, ironically enough.