It goes without saying—or should go without saying—that when you’re in New York, you don’t order pizza from a chain. No matter how mediocre your pizza options are in the Big Apple (and there are plenty of mediocre pizza parlors) it’s going to be at least 100 times better than the best that a nationwide brand has to offer.
But in the case of New York Jets rookie quarterback Bryce Petty—a 24-year-old who hails from Midlothian, Texas—all it took was a relatively clever and convenient marketing plan to be led astray from true culinary delight. Let his ignorance overwhelm you:
The fact that you can order @dominos by texting a pizza emoji is awesome… #welldoneMrDominoWellDone
— Bryce Petty (@b_petty14) August 28, 2015
The online reaction to this pronouncement was appropriately swift and merciless.
@b_petty14 Jesus has placed you among the finest pizzerias in the country yet you choose dominos? Why do you reject His Love? Open ur heart
— Doc Ad (@Doc__Ad) August 28, 2015
@b_petty14 @dominos you're letting the terrorists win Bryce.
— Apollyon (@Tadgho78) August 28, 2015
@b_petty14 @dominos take Michael Scott's recommendation @theofficenbc pic.twitter.com/2IlELzjWiJ
— Ryan Vano (@RyanJVano) August 28, 2015
Either way, do you really want to order pizza from a chain that, as Donald Trump might say, is the high end of the low-quality pizzerias?
Oh, and by the way, Bryce, when you do come to your senses and order a real New York pizza, do not eat it with a fork and knife.
Thankfully, it appears Petty has learned his lesson.
I apologize for stirring up the pizza community for my recent comment. CLEARLY I have some pizza to eat, suggestions are accepted
— Bryce Petty (@b_petty14) August 28, 2015
😱😱😨😨 my first altercation with fans is over pizza… I guess it could be worse pic.twitter.com/oe4GDMpRAq
— Bryce Petty (@b_petty14) August 28, 2015
Photo via apasciuto/Flickr (CC BY 2.0)