A viral TikTok is forcing women to rehash a familiar conversation about male entitlement after two men refused to take “no” for an answer at a brewery.
Jam (@hotweirdgirl69) started recording after two strange men sat down at the table she was sharing with her friend. She captioned her video, which has been viewed over 4.3 million times, “How many times do you have to say no to a man.” Based on how this particular encounter went, the answer is a ridiculously high number of times.
Jam started off fairly polite, keeping the tone light as she referred to their spot as a “girls only table” and told the men that she was “respectfully asking you to go to another table.”
When that didn’t suffice, she turned the camera around to film them—and to show just how much space was available in the brewery. Multiple tables were completely free, and plenty of others had partial space, just as the one she was sharing with her friend.
But no matter what they said to the two men, they mostly just stared at the women blankly, as if they couldn’t believe they were being asked to move or thought the whole thing was just some big joke.
Over the course of the one minute and seven seconds Jam was recording, she tried being polite, telling them it was weird, suggesting other places they could sit, threatening to spill one of the men’s drink, telling them both she and her friend were already in relationships, and, when none of that worked, literally screaming for them to leave.
“I guess we’ll go then,” she said near the end. “You want our table? We’ll f**king go.”
@hotweirdgirl69 disgusting.
♬ original sound – hotweirdgirl69
Men can’t take ‘no’ for an answer
Although it was nearly impossible to hear anything the men said during the video, commenters immediately jumped to the conclusion that this had nothing to do with the actual table and everything to do with these guys feeling entitled to harass women who had repeatedly made it clear they were not interested.
“‘Why don’t girls just say no’ she’s SCREAMING it,” wrote @jjaerose26.
“100 men vs accepting rejection,” @thriftmami94 challenged, while @haradgalaxy pointed out, “girl tried – kind approach, funny approach, blunt approach, clear approach, leaving themselves approach. WE ARENT THE ISSUE.”
“The bear,” @e11evenkitty said, referencing the 2024 TikTok that made men furious. “All the damn time.”
A frustratingly familiar experience
Jam ultimately confirmed what everyone already knew in a follow-up video, telling viewers that one of the men kept saying his brother was interested in her friend.
“Why the heck are you sitting down when there’s like, a million different tables?” she wondered. “I guess it’s not criminal. They didn’t do anything physical. But it was weird. There’s no doubt it was weird and it deserved to be recorded, because you never know how things like that are going to escalate.”
She also explained that the brewery was loud enough that she didn’t think any of the people around them could actually hear what was going on, which explains why nobody stepped in. And even though it looked as if the two men might finally leave by the end of the video, Jam said she and her friend were the ones who abandoned the table and went upstairs to finish their food before calling it a night.
“They did get up and it looked like they were going to follow us, but I got up pretty quick to leave,” she said. “So I didn’t really give them the opportunity to follow us. So yeah, it was weird.”
But the fact that it got to that point left viewers frustrated—especially those who have found themselves in similar situations with random men who just don’t seem to grasp the idea that what they want isn’t the single most important factor during interactions with strangers.
“‘just stand up and leave’ why is it always us? why is it always OUR peace that gets disturbed? why is it always us that have to do something? THEY invade our space, they should be the ones going away,” @beatricescrive_ complained.
One commenter on Reddit who claims to have been at the brewery and “literally in this video at the bar trying to get a beer” alleged that they’ve seen these two men approach women in a similar fashion repeatedly.
Maybe now that they’ve gotten the attention they so desperately craved, they’ll figure out this is a bad approach—but nobody’s holding their breath.
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