penis map

Screengrab via @LBomb001/Twitter

This is serious. No, really.

A 26-year-old man is in critical but stable condition after being stabbed in Bristol, England, on Friday. The local police describe the attacker as a white man in his late 20s, about 5’7” and a large build, with scar or tattoo on his left wrist. On Monday, Avon and Somerset Constabulary issued a public appeal for witnesses to come forward. 

There’s just one problem: The map the police issued looked like a middle-schooler had drawn a giant dong on it. 

Police swiftly responded to the viral attention the map received. “This is a serious appeal for information after a man was left in need of hospital treatment following a violent assault,” a spokesperson told the BBC. “Whatever the map may have resembled should not distract from the severity of the crime and our request for help from the public."

The image has since been updated to something a little less distracting—but let’s be real: There’s no unseeing that giant dick on the Bristol Channel. 

There’s a somewhat happy ending to the penis map saga: According to the BBC, a 30-year-old man and 27-year-old woman were arrested and have been released on bail in relation to the stabbing. 

H/T Mashable

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