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Comedy Central

Martha Stewart’s set from the Bieber roast is one for the history books

Give her a standup special, ASAP.


Audra Schroeder


Posted on Mar 31, 2015   Updated on May 29, 2021, 4:46 am CDT

There were a lot of “Oh, snap” moments during last night’s Roast of Justin Bieber, but the biggest snaps came courtesy of Martha Stewart.  

Here’s her full set, in which she knocks down Kevin Hart within the first 30 seconds, zings Chris D’Elia with a douche joke, then gives Justin Bieber some very solid advice for when he inevitably ends up in prison, while dissing Shaq’s mom. 

She then tells Bieber he needs a “player in the boardroom and a freak in the bedroom”—specifically, her. Someone please give her an hour special on Comedy Central, and remix her set with this song

Screengrab via Comedy Central

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*First Published: Mar 31, 2015, 12:24 pm CDT