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‘You’ll be able to tap the tuna wherever you go.’
Listen up, everyone: We have finally achieved gender equality, and it’s all thanks to the Wetter Sweater, which allows women to secretly masturbate in public.
OK, we’ll back up just a bit. Earlier this year, CamSoda announced the JerkShirt. It’s a dress shirt outfitted with a prosthetic hand so that guys can use their other hand to discreetly beat the meat without suspicion. Now the adult entertainment company has announced the Wetter Sweater for women.
Like the JerkShirt, the Wetter Sweater has a fake hand so that ladies can “tap the tuna” in public without anybody knowing. It comes in a variety of skin tones, sweater colors, and even nail colors for the ultimate customization.
Just imagine how chic you’d look in a wine-colored sweater with gold glitter nails, all the while getting your pleasure on.
You can apparently sign up on the Wetter Sweater’s website to receive updates as to when you can actually put money down for the garment.
As we thought with the JerkShirt, masturbating at work isn’t the best idea. But, you know, at least women now have the opportunity to make the same horrible decision guys do.
Happy endings to both guys and gals everywhere.
Gabe Bergado is a Daily Dot alumnus who covered dank memes, teens, and the weirdest corners of the Internet. One time, Ted Cruz supporters turned him into a meme—or at least tried to. In 2017, he started reporting for Teen Vogue's entertainment section.