- ‘Star Trek: Discovery’ delivers a powerfully political episode Thursday 8:30 PM
- Bowser is taking over Nintendo—and the memes make themselves Thursday 7:02 PM
- California aims to strengthen data breach notification law Thursday 5:37 PM
- Feds say college student operated drug business through gaming app Thursday 4:36 PM
- Trump is again using old videos to claim his border wall is ‘under construction Thursday 4:05 PM
- Laura Loomer led a second protest at Twitter yesterday Thursday 3:37 PM
- The eyes have it in these ‘Alita: Battle Angel’ memes Thursday 2:13 PM
- Facebook let advertisers target users interested in infamous Nazis Thursday 1:58 PM
- Dem senator promises to put net neutrality on the ‘political hot seat’ in coming months Thursday 1:28 PM
- Someone figured out that Toothless from ‘How to Train Your Dragon’ looks just like Bulbasaur Thursday 12:44 PM
- Disturbing Snapchat video shows 17-year-old throwing dog on trampoline Thursday 12:16 PM
- How to watch the new Bon Appetit channel for free Thursday 12:03 PM
- Eminem disses Netflix for canceling ‘The Punisher’ Thursday 11:50 AM
- Florida prisons sued for depriving inmates of music they paid for Thursday 11:36 AM
- Chris Hemsworth will become Hulk Hogan for Netflix biopic Thursday 11:29 AM
We all had a good laugh at the Australian teen who dropped his new iPhone on live TV, but that’s nothing compared to the ignominy of having lost it to the commode. Such an accident confirms the dirty truth we try not to think about: that everyone surfs the Web while shitting.
Damn! My iphone 6 just flushed in the toilet bowl 😕
— muhayat (@muhayat_nurIman) September 21, 2014
Jada just got the IPhone 6 today and she deadass dropped it in the toilet
— Katelyn Burchfield (@katelyn_burchh) September 21, 2014
omg my friend dropped her brand new iphone 6 in the toilet…..
— Kae (@stevenyeuns) September 20, 2014
My little brother has to be the first dumbass to drop the iPhone 6 in the toilet
— Spanky (@Spanky_MOB) September 20, 2014
— Frank Ojeda (@ucladodgerdog) September 19, 2014
Idk which is worst, the guy who dropped his iPhone 6 or me dropping phone in the toilet while it’s flushing.
— Diana (@Ghanaa_Made) September 19, 2014
First day I get the iPhone 6 I drop it in the toilet. 😐
— michael (@michael_43_) September 20, 2014
I literally just dropped the iPhone 6 in the toilet and it survived…
— michelleur* (@edminthesun) September 21, 2014
These reports more or less confirmed various predictions.
Summary of my wife’s first day with her iPhone 6: my daughter hasn’t put it in the toilet yet. Will update again tomorrow.
— Dan Benjamin (@danbenjamin) September 21, 2014
iPhone 6 more slippery than iPhone 5. Beware when texting or tweeting on the toilet seat.
— Pierre (@_Pierre_) September 21, 2014
Some drunk sorority girl will drop her iPhone 6+ in the toilet tonight and have another one by Tuesday
— G-Buck (@djgbuck) September 20, 2014
bravery is using this iPhone 6 on the toilet #noinsurance
— chance hr higgins (@horseribs) September 21, 2014
@JoshK_ the iphone 6 was proven in studies to increase time spent on the toilet by up to 65%
— Alex Gebert (@A_GEB) September 20, 2014
Other people seem to be dropping old phones in the toilet on purpose, just so they’ll have an excuse to shell out a few hundred bucks for a newer model.
got drunk and dropped my phone in a toilet, iPhone 6 here I come😊
— Kristy Ann (@KristyNazario12) September 14, 2014
Dropped my iPhone 5s in the toilet last night before the iPhone 6 went on sale. What a coincidence. 😜 pic.twitter.com/RCIbJrX8Ik
— John Benavidez (@ProfBenavidez) September 12, 2014
My sister dropped her phone in the toilet and now she is getting the iPhone 6 the day it comes out:’)
— Mo (@that1chick_mo_) September 15, 2014
I may or may not get the iPhone 6 bc I dropped my phone in the toilet
— raina (@RainaWants5SOS) September 21, 2014
ok i rly want the iphone 6 now . i’m debating whether to throw my phone against a wall or flush it down the toilet
— ✦ (@direfuls) September 15, 2014
I guess dropping your phone in the toilet has its perks… Proud owner of the iPhone 6 ☺️
— Morgan Ryle (@morgan_ryle) September 20, 2014
Of course, there’s more than one way to break your fabulous status symbol.
These poor souls, anyone else already crack their iPhone 6 screen? pic.twitter.com/YbzOMzjIR5
— Jailbreak Matrix (@JailbreakMatrix) September 20, 2014
iPhone 6.. Cracked screen it ain’t even 24hrs. 😫 pic.twitter.com/RTG8FDdjiy
— Travis (@Devastation) September 19, 2014
— Adam Riesenfeld (@adamriesenfeld) September 21, 2014
My face when David broke his iPhone 6 pic.twitter.com/PiFfLjxuUd
— superman (@OsmarCantu) September 21, 2014
At the party I went to a girl had a new iPhone 6 in her pocket and somebody pushed her into the pool, the phone hit the bottom and broke👀
— molly (@arianasgaIaxy) September 21, 2014
Oh, well—it’s about time to line up for the iPhone 7 anyway.
Miles Klee is a novelist and web culture reporter. The former editor of the Daily Dot’s Unclick section, Klee’s essays, satire, and fiction have appeared in Lapham’s Quarterly, Vanity Fair, 3:AM, Salon, the Awl, the New York Observer, the Millions, and the Village Voice. He's the author of two odd books of fiction, 'Ivyland' and 'True False.'