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Man captures bee, forces it to watch ‘Bee Movie’
It didn’t seem to like it.
There are basically three ways an encounter with a bee can go: You can shoo it away, you can kill it, or you can get stung. (Maybe, if you’re pure of heart, you can feed it and get a tiny high-five in return.)
But Twitter user @whiteandfaded doesn’t subscribe to typical bee protocol. Granted, he showed familiar apprehension when one invaded his home.
Home invasion in progress pic.twitter.com/Qkg5wMF3KP
— bran flake ass ‘MAN’ (@whiteandfaded) June 13, 2016
In short order, however, he had captured the intrusive insect.
He mine now pic.twitter.com/wsHI9gKvjm
— bran flake ass ‘MAN’ (@whiteandfaded) June 13, 2016
But this left him with yet another decision to make.
Wait hol up
— bran flake ass ‘MAN’ (@whiteandfaded) June 13, 2016
Though not the decision you’d assume.
What do I do with the bee?
— bran flake ass ‘MAN’ (@whiteandfaded) June 13, 2016
This being the internet—a place where the animated Jerry Seinfeld vehicle Bee Movie (2007) has become something of an ironically revered cult classic mined for a plethora of bee-related memes—there could only ever have been one outcome here.
@whiteandfaded the people have spoken
— bran flake ass ‘MAN’ (@whiteandfaded) June 13, 2016
almost time pic.twitter.com/4BhEMam6dL
— bran flake ass ‘MAN’ (@whiteandfaded) June 13, 2016
And that, friends, is how this bee wound up spending what could well be its dying moments watching Bee Movie.
I’m watching Bee Movie with a bee🐝 pic.twitter.com/Daub2dXTfc
— bran flake ass ‘MAN’ (@whiteandfaded) June 13, 2016
@whiteandfaded don’t be fucking rude offer him some honey or something
— Joes before hoes (@NakedHotdog) June 13, 2016
@whiteandfaded y isnt it flying
— i am not funny (@nesquikboi200) June 13, 2016
Ideally he’ll make it all the way through and offer us a stinging critique.
Update 5:23pm CT, June 13: The bee survived and presumably returned to the hive to spoil Bee Movie for all the other bees.
Ok the bee’s gone now that was a good way to kill 2 hours
— bran flake ass ‘MAN’ (@whiteandfaded) June 13, 2016

Miles Klee
Miles Klee is a novelist and web culture reporter. The former editor of the Daily Dot’s Unclick section, Klee’s essays, satire, and fiction have appeared in Lapham’s Quarterly, Vanity Fair, 3:AM, Salon, the Awl, the New York Observer, the Millions, and the Village Voice. He's the author of two odd books of fiction, 'Ivyland' and 'True False.'