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Scottish singer Lewis Capaldi grossed out the internet yesterday when he dropped a video of himself licking an entire packet of Oreos before putting them up for auction on eBay. Capaldi assured everyone that this “wasn’t some dark corner of the internet” because he was doing it in aid of music therapy charity Nordoff-Robins, and the Oreos are apparently for display only—complete with a signed glass display case. But in the world that brought us Belle Delphine’s bathwater and the men who drank it, how sure can he be that the Oreos are going to end up on display and not in someone’s belly?
Well, as it turns out, Oreo has varnished the cookies to keep them from getting disgusting in the box (might want to have shared that part in the video, Oreo, we’re just saying).
No mould here, they've been varnished to preserve their Capaldi-liciousness!— OREO Cookie (@Oreo) August 22, 2019
Then again Belle Delphine’s bathwater wasn’t for drinking either, but that didn’t stop some of her fans from doing so.
At least it's not bath water... But if this is real then won't the oreos crumble eventually and all you will be left with is a signed box? 😂— Marc Wilson (@tsukasa487r2) August 22, 2019
Despite the bidding reaching £1550, apparently, some Twitter users don’t even know who he is.
Who is Lewis Capaldi?— Paul Vincent (@AstronomiconSF) August 22, 2019
And more of them seem disgusted than enthusiastic.
we should have all died in 2012— Brad 🗿 (@BradleyNeville7) August 21, 2019
#LewisCapaldiOreo rather clamp my balls into a vice— Jake Lander (@JakeLander) August 21, 2019
#LewisCapaldiOreo— J🎯HN SALMON 🐟 (@Catchasalmon88) August 22, 2019
Na, Your alright. Id rather staple my tongue to the back of a racehorse.
One person compared the Oreo campaign to the Ariana Grande donut incident. But they’re not the same. The Oreo auction is for charity, and what she did was a health hazard. Still, there’s an aesthetic similarity.
So when ariana licks q donut and put it back its disgusting (and yes it is. i love her but it was wrong) but when lewis capaldi does it, itd a prize..... hmmm #LewisCapaldiOreo— Ocean Isnt A Girl. (@FFHdidthat) August 22, 2019
yeah completely agree but the fact a company willingly ran this as a competition after all the shit of the donut licking and ice cream licking is fucked— Ocean Isnt A Girl. (@FFHdidthat) August 22, 2019
One man felt the need to point out the hygiene implications.
'This packet may contain: Sexually Transmitted Diseases, Hepatitis B, Hepatitis C, Rhinovirus, Fluvirus & godknows what else' Great marketing 👍 Would've been easier to just donate to charity yourself. Less risk involved.#Oreo #lewiscapaldioreo https://t.co/X639R2TZDj— Jord (@okoksixx) August 22, 2019
Though he took it too far, as Twitter user Jord stepped in to clarify —you won’t get half of those diseases from saliva even if you were about to eat a box of varnished cookies.
Hepatitis C is transmitted via needles and Hepatitis B via blood and SOME bodily fluids, ie, NOT saliva. Rhinitis is a common cold. It’s not like someone would eat them anyway.— grace (@graceknott03) August 22, 2019
He also had some defenders and even fans.
You lot really need to lighten up 😂 it’s clearly done for humour and a good cause 😂 the guy’s funny af and a national treasure #LewisCapaldiOreo— FuCKtHePoPULaTiON (@DestinyDollX0X0) August 22, 2019
Either way, the cookies are still available for bidding if you really want them. What you do with them afterward if really up to you. (Please don’t eat them).
Siobhan Ball is a historian, archivist, and journalist. She also writes for Autostraddle and bi.org