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Craigslister is selling a jar of Kevin Spacey’s breath
It’s believed to be chicken pasta-scented.
Collectors of celebrity breath, today is your lucky day: Someone in Vancouver has put a mason jar full of actor Kevin Spacey’s exhalations up for sale on Craigslist.
“I got this for my mother while working on the set of American Beauty,” the seller explains. “She was a huge Kevin Spacey fan before she passed away, I think because he resembled her first husband that loved woodwork.”
The best part: You can name your own price.
Here’s the memento reclining on appropriately luxurious furniture:
Some further background:
I don’t know if Kevin Spacey knows anything about dovetail joints or how to work an auger, but apparently he likes breathing into jars. Anyway, this is real, it’s his actual breath in there. If I recall correctly, we had some sort of chicken pasta for lunch before I asked him to blow in the jar. It’s hasn’t been opened since. Any questions, feel free to ask. If I’m not home, just leave me a voicemail. I don’t text, sorry. Make me an offer!
We emailed to ascertain whether the breath could be shipped internationally—it does seem a bit fragile—and to propose a trade: A jar of Kevin Kline’s breath for the jar of Kevin Spacey’s. We’ll update if the deal goes forward, and does anyone have Kevin Kline’s agent’s number?
Miles Klee is a novelist and web culture reporter. The former editor of the Daily Dot’s Unclick section, Klee’s essays, satire, and fiction have appeared in Lapham’s Quarterly, Vanity Fair, 3:AM, Salon, the Awl, the New York Observer, the Millions, and the Village Voice. He's the author of two odd books of fiction, 'Ivyland' and 'True False.'