If there’s one thing we can always hold to be true, it’s that putting googly eyes on things, people, and animals is hilarious. The city of Savannah is not laughing, however, after a prankster put the ubiquitous plastic craft supplies on a statue of Revolutionary War hero Nathanael Greene in the city’s Johnson Square.
Greene was a Major General inv the Continental Army and one of George Washington’s most valuable officers. His remains rest in a monument near the statue.
The City of Savannah Government Facebook page put out a post on Thursday hoping to track down the person who gave Greene the hilarious (but definitely, totally illegal) makeover.
“It may look funny but harming our historic monuments and public property is no laughing matter, in fact, it’s a crime,” the posts reads, adding that anyone with information as to the identity of the vandal should call the Savannah Police Department.
Who did this?! Someone placed googly eyes on our historic #NathanaelGreene statue in #JohnsonSquare. It may look funny…Posted by City of Savannah Government on Thursday, October 11, 2018
The whole thing may seem (or if we’re being honest, is) funny, but the city means serious business; the incident is being treated as a misdemeanor criminal trespass. But according to the Savannah Morning News, if the damage exceeds $500 it gets bumped up to criminal damage to property, which is a felony offense.
“Included in the definition of criminal trespass is the defacing, mutilating or defiling any grave marker, monument or memorial to one or more deceased persons who served in the military service,” the law states.
Social media posts tend to be a cesspool for public outrage, but going by the comments on the post, Savannah residents are, uh, not taking the alleged crime seriously.
“Turns out that I’m nowhere near white enough to be outraged by this,” quipped one commenter, while another added, “I’m blonde haired, green eyed, my foundation color is called Snow… And I’m not even white enough to be mad at this.”
Another evoked Dwight from The Office with a GIF captioned, “Defacing historic monuments with googly eyes is not a joke, Jim! It is a crime! This is no laughing matter!”
Others on Twitter had similar sentiments:
Artist's rendering of the Fort Myers Robert E. Lee statue, improved with the addition of googly eyes. pic.twitter.com/wUjnNmJE3z— Charles Johnson (@Green_Footballs) October 13, 2018
Against all evidence, city of Savannah claims googly eyes glued to Revolutionary War statue are "not funny" https://t.co/9l9kS2kqmQ— Xeni Jardin (@xeni) October 13, 2018
"THIS IS THE POLICE! WE HAVE THE HOUSE SURROUNDED! COME OUT WITH THE GOOGLY EYES AND NO ONE GETS HURT"— Frank the Dasher (@vwdasher) October 14, 2018
While someone else made a valid point:
Nathanael Greene owned enslaved people. he can get these googly eyes https://t.co/LCkwexYccN— wikipedia brown says #CancelConway (@eveewing) October 14, 2018
Is it worth getting slapped with a possible a felony over a prank that entertains an entire city, and the rest of the internet by proxy? Twitter definitely seems to think so.