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Starbucks wants you to spend $200 on a $50 gift card for mom

Who are you to resist?

 

Jam Kotenko

Internet Culture

Posted on Apr 27, 2015   Updated on May 28, 2021, 11:36 pm CDT

You are at a Starbucks ordering a Captain Crunch Frappuccino when you suddenly hear your mom’s favorite song (“Banana Boat (Day-O)” by Harry Belafonte) in the background. You realize that, crap, Mother’s Day is less than two weeks away and you still don’t have a present for her!

Thankfully, Starbucks—yes, the very establishment you’re standing in now—has a pretty good pitch for something special to hand your mama come May 10. It’s a very pretty, very fancy Starbucks gift card pre-loaded with $50 she can spend in the store… and it’ll only cost you $200.

Starbucks

Why does it cost four times as much as it’s worth? It’s more than a gift card, Starbucks assures you. It’s a metal and ceramic gift card adorned with flowers etched via laser. (See? It’s neat.) It comes in an elegant box made of solid gold cardboard, beautified by a matching floral design, which is great because she can totally use it to keep her real gifts in:

For Mother’s Day, give her beautiful flowers—the ones etched into this elegant and exclusive Starbucks Card.

Offered for the first time ever, this Mother’s Day Starbucks Card makes an elegant gift with its laser-etched floral details and satin ceramic finish. It comes pre-loaded with $50 on the Card and packaged in a beautiful gift box with matching design.

Starbucks

By the looks of its order page, Starbucks thinks their loyal fans would be more than willing to shell out two Benjamins for this thoughtful, sumptuous gift, i.e. about ten grande frapps, exclusively available via online order. And it’s so rare that a customer may only buy one. Collector’s item!

If you’re in the market for even more coffee-themed bling, Starbucks also suggests giving mommy dearest a traveler mug or tumbler studded with Swarovski crystals, priced at $70 and $100 respectively.

Here’s an even better gift idea, though: an in-person visit to the home you grew up in, where you hand your mom $200. Smash cut to Vegas montage.

Photo via Starbucks

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*First Published: Apr 27, 2015, 5:16 pm CDT