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Do you have large breasts that cleave together no matter what you wear? Well, too bad, because you’re officially unfashionable. At least that’s what British Vogue is reporting in its December issue, where it says the latest styles have been noticeably modest when it comes to cleavage.
However, it’s one thing to notice a trend, and another to ask readers if “cleavage is out.” The be-breasted among the magazine’s Twitter followers didn’t quite appreciate the question.
I’m glad Vogue has declared the cleavage over because it gives me ample time to get rid of my old boobs and get new ones from Topshop
— Holly Baxter (@h0llyb4xter) November 2, 2016
Vogue saying cleavage is over😂😂 boobs are no longer in trend😂😂I’ll just take them off n put them away till they r fashionable then ok X
— ® (@rachel_joyce) November 3, 2016
The “stop telling women what to do with their bodies” reaction is common to most things fashion magazines—whose job it is to tell women what to put on their bodies—publish, but there is a big difference between asking if denim jackets are still cool and turning that same question on a body part lots of people are born with and can’t do much about. And arguing against showing cleavage can quickly perpetuate myths that women with large breasts are inherently sexual or of “abnormal size,” rather than just women with large breasts.
Then again, Vogue didn’t necessarily say big boobs are unfashionable, just visible cleavage. Though that’s certainly harder to avoid when you have big boobs. Anyway, can the future where we’re all assigned utilitarian jumpsuits happen already?
Jaya Saxena is a lifestyle writer and editor whose work focuses primarily on women's issues and web culture. Her writing has appeared in GQ, ELLE, the Toast, the New Yorker, Tthe Hairpin, BuzzFeed, Racked, Eater, Catapult, and others. She is the co-author of 'Dad Magazine,' the author of 'The Book Of Lost Recipes,' and the co-author of 'Basic Witches.'