recruiter speaking with caption 'Protect yourself from snakes at work' (l) hand holding phone with email notification on screen in front of laptop on table (c) recruiter speaking with hand on chest (r)

oatawa/Shutterstock @emily.the.recruiter/TikTok (Licensed)

‘I started doing this and it’s been peaceful ever since’: Recruiter shares how to deal with ‘toxic’ co-workers

'It's what I do now to protect myself.'

 

Melody Heald

IRL

Posted on Mar 3, 2023   Updated on Mar 3, 2023, 1:59 pm CST

A recruiter shares in a viral TikTok how to deal with toxic co-workers—by getting everything they ask for in writing.

TikTok user Emily Durham (@emily.the.recruiter) typically posts job advice for her 319,000 followers. This time, she shares how to tackle toxic co-workers.

“Every time they ask you for something, ask them to put it in writing,” Durham advises. “They ask you for something, you say, ‘that’s awesome. Would you mind just popping it into an email? It’s how I track my deliverables.'”

She says regardless if this is true, this method protects you from false allegations of not doing the job correctly.

During an interview with The Daily Dot, Durham revealed she’s worked as a recruiter for seven years. Durham said she learned this method from working in “people-focused” jobs and has used this method in the past where it saved her from “some challenging situations.” She also offered another piece of advice on how to deal with difficult co-workers.

“I always like to approach relationships assuming the best [intentions] of the other person and extending empathy. It’s important to remember your co-worker might not be toxic. They may just be having a bad day. So operating with empathy first and THEN protecting yourself once it has become a pattern is the way to go,” she wrote via email.

@emily.the.recruiter This is how to deal with toxic coworkers and protect yourself #toxicworkplace #toxiccoworker #jobs #jobhunting #corporatelife #careers #toronto ♬ original sound – Emily The Recruiter

Durham’s video racked up over 635,000 views as of Mar. 3, resonating with viewers as they shared how this method has worked for them.

“It works! I had a co-worker who always complained. But one day I asked her to put her complaint in an email. Never got an email and no more complaints,” one viewer shared.

“I did that and the person denied they asked for something, I forwarded them the email, and no reply,” a second said.

“I have been using this trick for many years,it really saved me many times. I proved a lot of cases,” a third wrote.

However, some claimed the tactic backfired on them.

“I tried that and the toxic supervisor threw a tantrum and flipped out at everyone for not listening to instructions being told to them in person,” one person said.

“This doesn’t work because they will twist what they wrote and say ‘you misunderstood’ or ‘you misinterpreted,’” a second commented.

“I told that toxic coworker to do this and she reported back to my manager and I was the one who got in trouble,” a third stated.

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*First Published: Mar 3, 2023, 1:58 pm CST