Hear the winners of PornHub’s anthem contest in all their moaning glory

If there’s one thing that PornHub values—besides porn, of course—it’s a good promotional campaign that finds kitschy ways to give back.

From planting trees in the name of adult entertainment to donating money to breast cancer research, the streaming-porn giant is as charitable as it is unsafe for work.

But PornHub’s philanthropic efforts extend far beyond giving away free porn on Valentine’s Day. The self-proclaimed “premier destination for free online adult entertainment” cares as much about furthering its viewers’ SFW creative talents as it does about a good money shot. That’s why, when the site announced its venture into the music industry with PornHub Records last fall, it also launched an international contest to find the site’s new official anthem.

The contest solicited thousands of entries from artists around the globe, spanning genres, degrees of talent, and vocal ranges. Ultimately, though, the competition was just too stiff, and the site ended up crowning two winners with distinctly different musical interpretations of the official sound of PornHub. 

“Our celebrity judges had the difficult task of finding a sole winner that epitomized our brand,” said PornHub Vice President Corey Price. “Fortunately for us, however, the submissions were amazing enough that our talented, well-versed judges were able to choose two.”

Jordan Royale’s winning theme, described by Rolling Stone as “quasi-trappy rap and EDM,” is reminiscent of a rapping Transformer whose musical influences include Kid Rock and Paul Wall.

Mihannah Zhang’s winning track sounds a bit like a band formed at an all-girls summer rock camp fronted by Jenna Jameson.

The winners were picked after much deliberation among a celebrity panel which included such talents as “Grammy Award winning artist T-Pain, top hip hop producer Scott Storch and VICE music editor Dan Ozzi.” 

PornHub is giving each winner $5,000 to make a music video of their tracks, as well as guaranteeing digital distribution of the videos with at least 500,000 views. 

Photo via Kenny Louie/Flickr (CC BY 2.0)