Porn stars offer free blowjobs to everyone if the Patriots win the Super Bowl

If you thought the 2016 election proposed the greatest moral quandary of our time, well, here’s a tougher one: You can get a blowjob from two different porn stars, but only if the New England Patriots emerge victorious in Super Bowl LI.

I know you hate the Pats, and I know you love the idea of blowjobs from porn stars, so I don’t really know what to tell you to do. Vote your conscience, I guess.

Carmen Valentina

Carmen Valentina

Screengrab via OfficialTeamBJ/YouTube

 

Lauren Phillips

Lauren Phillips

Screengrab via OfficialTeamBJ/YouTube

 

I’ll just explain the sitch.

It’s the fifth-ever #TeamBJ, where porn stars pick a side in an event, and if that side prevails, blowjobs for all. That team loses? No blowjobs for anyone.

Previous events have included the World Cup, the NBA finals, and, coincidentally, the 2016 election.

For this event, porn stars Lauren Phillips and Carmen Valentina have teamed up. All you have to do is follow them on Twitter (those links up there will take you to their respective pages). If the Pats win and you follow them, you’ll get information on how to get your blowjob.

Here’s a video that explains it all, but I’m not really sure it’s necessary.

H/T BroBible

David Covucci

David Covucci

David Covucci is the Layer 8 editor at the Daily Dot, covering the intersection of politics and the web. His work has appeared in Vice, the Huffington Post, Jezebel, Gothamist, and other publications. He is particularly interested in hearing any tips you have. Reach out at [email protected]