FailChips

Photo via FailChips

FailChips are like regular potato chips—only superior in every way

You've been eating potato chips wrong your whole life.

 

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Posted on Feb 14, 2017   Updated on May 25, 2021, 12:14 am CDT

SPONSORED BY FAILCHIPS

Let’s begin at the beginning.

This is you:

You’re like, “Unnnnggghhhh, I want chips in my mouth, but I don’t want to get flavor crud all over my hands.”

We’ve all been there. It’s painful. It’s lonely. Nobody understands you.

But thankfully, you don’t have to feel chip-misunderstood anymore because we have lovingly crafted the perfect solution just for you.

Say hello to your new favorite snack phenomenon: FailChips.

What are they you ask?

They’re like regular potato chips, except smaller, more delicious, and superior in every way.

Let’s back up a bit.

Potato chips are great! Everybody knows that. It’s science…and history. It’s science history.

But for a long time now, you’ve begun to sense a sinister truth at the heart of everything you’ve come to know and love about chips. Maybe you felt it nagging at you, but you couldn’t quite put your finger on exactly what it was.

Well, let us tell you: Potato chips are way too big. They’re just so much work. Who has time to fit an entire chip inside their mouth hole? Not us…

Luckily we found a solve for this very issue.

Introducing FailChips: A new chip phenomenon that packages crushed potato chips for your snacking pleasure.

That’s right. FailChips are made out of bigger chips that we ruthlessly crushed. (It’s actually an incredibly satisfying process.)

But let us put it another way: Can you eat a potato chip one-handed?

We’d like to see you try. You need one hand to hold the bag and one hand to pull out the chip. They really make you work for it.

But now you can rest your pretty little head about this major issue. FailChips are a one-handed snack. Just tear a corner off the bag and pour the chips straight into your pie hole, or rather, chip-hole. Your tastebuds will thank you.

But back to the point…

Here are a few things that FailChips provide a remedy for*:

  • Nighttime Hunger Screaming

  • Snack-Jealousy

  • Crunch Addiction Panic

  • Flavor-Craving Spasms

  • Lonely Mouth Syndrome

Our basic point is that FailChips are amazing because they have more chips in every chip.

Still have questions? Never fear. Head on over to the failchips.com to learn more.

You’re welcome.

*Please note: the American Medical Association has not approved these claims, or the existence of the above-mentioned conditions. Please also note that Fail Chips are delicious. Please also note that we’d like to thank you for noting what we just asked you to note.

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*First Published: Feb 14, 2017, 12:10 pm CST