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Hint: Always use a condom.
Are you an elegant lady? Do you idolize Grace Kelly and drink rooibos tea with your pinky out and insist on wearing a floppy hat to all social functions because that’s what they did in the 1950s? Then you need footwear that is just as classy as you are.
That’s why a luxury footwear brand has developed handmade heels featuring “unusual designs which incorporate beautiful accessories for erotic play.”
That’s their way of saying that these shoes double as functional butt plugs.
The shoes are the brainchild of upscale shoe designer Ainsley-T, which describes itself as a brand that sells “shoes for your erotic life.” They come in various colors and textures, including black-and-red patent leather and neon suede. They cost around 246 Euros ($264). And in case you’re wondering if this is an April Fools’ joke, it’s not: Ainsley-T has been selling the shoes since at least 2013, if the very, very NSFW demos on the brand’s Tumblr are any indication.
At this point, you also might be wondering: Exactly what demographic are these heels supposed to target? It’s a good question. Ainsley-T also sells gag sandals and butt-plug boots for kinksters and foot fetishists, so they’re clearly committed to the intersection of fashion and, well, “function.”
The website recommends “the use of a condom if the shoes are to be used for anal or vaginal play.” It also says that heels should be cleaned “with liquid soap and soft cloth only.”
H/T Metro | Photo via Ainsley-T
EJ Dickson is a writer and editor who primarily covers sex, dating, and relationships, with a special focus on the intersection of intimacy and technology. She served as the Daily Dot’s IRL editor from January 2014 to July 2015. Her work has since appeared in the New York Times, Rolling Stone, Mic, Bustle, Romper, and Men’s Health.