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Best. Roommate. Ever.

Eff the rest: He's the best roommate you'll ever have.


Lauren Rae Orsini


Posted on Aug 19, 2011   Updated on Jun 3, 2021, 3:16 am CDT

Living in San Francisco and looking for a new roommate? Craigslist has found you a doozy.

Under a post titled “Best. Roommate. Ever.”, one native Alabaman pitches his greatness in expletive-riddled speech.

“I’m respectful, quiet, clean and I won’t bother any of your shit,” he writes. “If you leave shit out, I’m just like, ‘Oh fuck I better not mess with this shit, because it’s not mine.’ I turn off lights. I clean toilets. Fuck it. I’ll even cook for you.”

The Best Roommate Ever, who prefers to be anonymous for work reasons, is prepared to persuade you. He’s cultured (“Do you like movies? I fucking love them”), friendly (“I FUCKING LOVE PEOPLE”) and considerate (“I’m offering to buy you shit already!”)

At first, the Best Roommate Ever went about his search more professionally, told the Daily Dot. An online social media marketer by trade, he had the solution.

“When I didn’t get any responses, I decided to market myself,” he said. “It went viral in 24 hours.”

As a result, the Best Roommate Ever has received 10,000 emails and counting. Now, he can’t read the responses quickly enough.

Among them are not just roommate inquiries, but offers of “places to crash, jobs, money, and sex.” He’s received offers to stay with fans in Japan, South Africa, and Australia.

“It’s insane,” he said. “It’s amazing to watch something I made on my lunch break turn into something this big. I never knew the Internet could be so kind.”

The Best Roommate Ever set up a Twitter account to keep fans updated on his search.

He’s keeping it fresh with choice tweets such as this: “Naked in your bedroom? Don’t worry! I knock. Every. Fucking. Time.”

As of press time, he hasn’t found that elusive place to stay yet. He said he thinks the golden crash pad might already be in his inbox.

He’ll have to dig through that mountain of email to find out.

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*First Published: Aug 19, 2011, 6:50 pm CDT