A woman on TikTok recently shared a series of videos explaining how she left her job as an au pair after the child she was caring for slapped her.
The woman, named Nicole (@nicoletheedramaqueen), has about 21,000 followers on TikTok and often posts about her job as an au pair, a young foreign person who helps with housework or child care in exchange for room and board, in Italy.
In one video, Nicole says the child she cared for “bitch slapped” her across the face. She says the child was home sick from school that day and the two played games on a iPad for “longer than he’s allowed to.”
@nicoletheedramaqueen This has now become a horror story I believe #aupair #hostfamily #storytime #nanny #babysitter #childcare #kids #forthegirls #horrorstory #slap #canadian #travel ♬ original sound – nicole
Nicole says she ended up taking the iPad away after the child exceeded his screen-time limit, and she suggested multiple other games they could play together. He only wanted to watch TV, but she wouldn’t allow him.
The child had an “absolute meltdown,” which Nicole attempted to calm him down from, she says. She tried remaining calm during the situation, but then the child started repeatedly punching her and screaming for his mother.
“He’s screaming directly in my face, and he fucking wallops me right across the face,” Nicole says in the video, imitating how the child slapped her. “I’m like, ‘Absolutely not.’ I back away from him. I’m like, ‘Get away from me right now. You can not treat people like that.'”
In a different TikTok video, Nicole explains that the way she quit didn’t go how she wanted it to, but she did what she had to do.
The TikToker says her dad instructed her to not tell the child’s family that she was quitting until they had a plan figured out. She says her psychologist also told her that she didn’t have to leave the same day she told the family, but she should be prepared to do so in case things went south.
@nicoletheedramaqueen Reply to @lillifitzpatrick how I quit my au pair job part 1 #aupair #nanny #babysitter #job #quitting #canadian #travel #forthegirls #work #hostfamily ♬ original sound – nicole
Nicole says she didn’t want to stay after telling the family anyway because she had heard from past au pairs that the family turned hostile after they said they were leaving.
“In a different situation I would have liked to give more notice, but I needed to get out of there as fast as possible because even though my brain was saying, ‘This isn’t a big deal, he’s a child,’ my body was understanding that he was an abuser,” Nicole says in the video.
“When he would touch me, I would have a visceral reaction to it,” she continues. “And if you think that sounds ridiculous, please remember I’m not a blank canvas of a person. I have past trauma, and unfortunately this situation did cause some of that to resurface.”
Nicole explains that the slap had happened Thursday, and she planned to tell the child’s parents Saturday that she was leaving. Although she hadn’t given them any notice, the parents could tell something was up, she says.
She couldn’t get the parents together without the child to tell them news, so Nicole ended up moving her things out of the home while they were gone, she says. Her dad told her not to go back to the house because it wasn’t worth it, so the au pair left.
Although Nicole wanted to tell the parents in person, her dad said she had no reason to go back and encouraged her to send a text, she says in another video.
Nicole sent a lengthy text message explaining that the situation wasn’t safe for herself or the child anymore and thanking them for the opportunity. She told the parents she wanted to drop off her keys to their house the next day and asked what a good time for them would be.
Nicole says the mother left her on read all night, and the father simply told her when to come and also said he would need her sim card back, presumably from her phone.
“So no, there was no apology, there was nothing,” Nicole says in the video. “At that point, I was content in my decision to not see them again because clearly they hated me now, and they didn’t care about me at all.”
In the video, Nicole adds that she doesn’t resent the family at all even though it did hurt that they didn’t seem to care about her.
After the lengthy story time, viewers reassured the TikToker that she did the right thing, and it wasn’t her fault that the family acted the way that they did.
“[Their] response proved you did the right thing,” one viewer commented on the video.
“BRUTAL- no apology or ask hit why you left. Glad you’re outta there,” a second viewer said.
A third said, “Just watched all the videos, its so good you left, that was definitely not a situation you should stay in.”
Other viewers applauded Nicole for sending a text instead of telling the family in person.
“Agree with dad. The ‘right’ professional thing to do benefits the employer. Glad you sent a text,” one user said.
A second viewer wrote, “Text was actually so smart! You avoided a lot of in person conflict.”
Another alleged child care provider told Nicole she did the right thing for both herself and the child: “As a child care provider- if you ever feel that you cannot provide A+ care due to how a child acts… get out. You did the right thing.”
The Daily Dot reached out to user @nicoletheedramaqueen via TikTok comment.
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