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Driver survives collision with fried-chicken joint, celebrates with public lewdness

Just another day in Philadelphia.


Mike Fenn


Posted on Jan 29, 2014   Updated on May 31, 2021, 7:53 pm CDT

Philadelphia is most commonly associated with history, unhealthy (but delicious) food, and police brutality. Now we can add “public masturbation” to that illustrious list. 

Chris Pagano first made headlines as the “Swiss Cheese Pervert.” Prior to his January 2014 arrest, he would cruise the streets of several Philadelphia neighborhoods—and even OKCupid—and ask random women to perform sex acts on him with a block of Swiss cheese.

Now, another Philadelphia-area man is finding sexual arousal in the arenas of automobile accidents and fried chicken.

A YouTube video stars New Jersey resident Vincent Wade shortly after he crashed his car into a Crown Fried Chicken location in North Philadelphia. Leaping from the car, he did what any of us practically none of us would do: Stripped naked and began masturbating. (Video NSFW.)

Police quickly came to the scene and apprehended Wade, who had since finished and returned to his car. The arrest turned out to be Wade’s 4th DUI.

From obnoxious sports fans to over-reacting police officers, Philadelphia has long had a reputation as a city full of jerkoffs. Apparently, nobody told Wade the term wasn’t meant to be taken literally. 

H/T Philadelphia Magazine / Photo via Johnathan Lobel/Flickr

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*First Published: Jan 29, 2014, 9:12 pm CST