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Driver survives collision with fried-chicken joint, celebrates with public lewdness
Just another day in Philadelphia.
Philadelphia is most commonly associated with history, unhealthy (but delicious) food, and police brutality. Now we can add “public masturbation” to that illustrious list.
Chris Pagano first made headlines as the “Swiss Cheese Pervert.” Prior to his January 2014 arrest, he would cruise the streets of several Philadelphia neighborhoods—and even OKCupid—and ask random women to perform sex acts on him with a block of Swiss cheese.
Now, another Philadelphia-area man is finding sexual arousal in the arenas of automobile accidents and fried chicken.
A YouTube video stars New Jersey resident Vincent Wade shortly after he crashed his car into a Crown Fried Chicken location in North Philadelphia. Leaping from the car, he did what
any of us practically none of us would do: Stripped naked and began masturbating. (Video NSFW.)
Police quickly came to the scene and apprehended Wade, who had since finished and returned to his car. The arrest turned out to be Wade’s 4th DUI.
From obnoxious sports fans to over-reacting police officers, Philadelphia has long had a reputation as a city full of jerkoffs. Apparently, nobody told Wade the term wasn’t meant to be taken literally.
Mike Fenn is a former contributor to the Daily Dot whose beats included Reddit, YouTube, and all things WTF. His work has also appeared in Forbes and News.com.au.