ryan lochte's dog carter

Photo via Ryan Lochte/Twitter

How old is Ryan Lochte's dog, really?

U.S. Olympic swimmer Ryan Lochte, a man with a jumping banana inside his head, isn't known for his ability to organize his thoughts, focus on what's going on around him, or even remember how many medals he's won. But he knows how old his dog, Carter, is: 8 years old. 

And Ryan tweets it every year. 

Something's not quite adding up here. Carter the dog has been eight years old for three consecutive years, something that's hard to explain unless: time travel? Fountain of youth? Or: Ryan Lochte bad at math.

Lochte seems to have lost track of his dog's age, and some people apparently follow his doggie birthday tweets closely enough that they noticed the discrepancy. So how old is Carter really, barring some accident of weird, time-bending science?

Probably 9 years old. The one time Lochte mentioned a specific birthdate for Carter, it was in 2007. And when he corrected his tweet over the weekend after being called out on it by dog age truthers, he changed Carter's age to 9. 

Lochte has lied, misremembered, or told half-truths to get out of bad situations in the past, though. There's no telling how deep this ageless dog conspiracy goes, or what else the government could be hiding in Ryan Lochte's reliably unreliable brain. 

What's the alternative? Believing a man forgot his beloved dog's age multiple times over a period of years? Ooooh-kay, whatever you say. 

Promoted Stories Powered by Sharethrough
ryan lochte
Anti-Ryan Lochte protesters storm the stage during 'Dancing With the Stars'
Dancing With the Stars, ABC’s celebrity-reality dance competition, has had its fair share of eyebrow-raising contestants in its 23 seasons to date. It’s featured "stars" who clearly didn’t want to be on the show, as well as contestants who made it further in the competition than some fans thought they should (sometimes ironically). But this time around, during the season premiere, one contestant’s appearance sparked an actual protest that required security intervention.
From Our VICE Partners
Group

Pure, uncut internet. Straight to your inbox.

Thanks for subscribing to our newsletter!