When decaying zombies walk through deserted cities and hellfire explodes from beneath the Earth, you’d think innovation would take a backseat to more pressing matters—like finding a friend who won’t eat your brains.
But this won’t be the case if DED Talks has anything to do with it. This zombified parody of TED—the conference where the world’s elite “thought leaders” discuss their big ideas—is offering up the best death hacks to survive as a zombie in a post-apocalyptic world where humans don’t take kindly to the undead.
Here are some of the top death hacks:
1) Don’t get shot in the head.
“Let them shoot you in the body. Consider this: If you get shot in the arm it is not a big deal. But if you lose a leg, you are not able to walk anymore. It is something to think about.”
2) Find a human being to eat.
The DED presenter recommends killing the person first, which makes for an opportunity to eat more of your victim before someone blows your zombie brains out.
3) Dress up as a human and pretend you are not a zombie.
Now we’re really innovating! Suggestions include wearing a silly hat or ripping off a piece of human flesh with a mustache attached.
Toward the end of the presentation, it is revealed that the speaker is actually a human, complete with gun in hand and rigged explosives, coming back to destroy all of the zombified DED attendees.
New zombie apocalypse strategy, anyone?