“Daddy love,” “MILF,” “just Bieber”: How the world searches for porn

International affairs publication PornMD (I know, right?) released the most important infographic of our time today: a geographic breakdown of the 10 most searched porn terms divided by country.

The lubricious—and mostly safe-for-work—graphic culls data from the last six months of search terms. “Ever wonder which states or countries are into what when it comes to what goes on behind closed doors?” the intro asks, even though we’re not sure who was wondering that.

Here are five things we learned about the world’s porn habits that we discovered without even having to apply for a Fulbright fellowship.

1) Canada loves Asians! Our welcoming, multinational northern neighbor has an Asian fetish. That was the most-searched-for term, following “teen,” “milf,” whatever “compilation” means, and “massage.”

2) Only gay guys trawl for porn in Peru. All 10 of the top terms were labeled “gay” and included peruano (twinky little Peruvian men), casero (homemade porn), cacheros (roughly translates to tops, or pitchers, if you will), and something called “just bieber” that we’ll leave to your imagination.

3) Obviously, Russia’s most-searched term is “russian.” In Soviet Russia, porn watches you, or it’s probably some Putin-mandated rule to increase nationalism. Interestingly, “Sasha Grey” was the country’s fifth-most-searched term.

4) Half of Iran’s most-searched terms are very gay. The notoriously homophobic country still manages to be a hub for horny gay guys looking for butt. Searches ranked four through eight are as follows: “daddy love,” “hairy,” “hotel businessman,” “Iranian,” and “shower.” (“Pussy” was the No. 1 most-searched term—your civilization isn’t totally on the brink of collapsing, Ahmadinejad.)

5) USA: Home of the free, land of the MILF. Hot moms were our top term, followed by “teen,” “college,” “creampie” (fattening?), and “massage.” There’s even a special state-by-state breakdown, which saw several Southern states featuring “ebony” as its top choice—so yay for civil rights!

Photo via fashion_dreams/Hashgram