Twitter has unveiled a new feature, and users are abuzz. Is it a way to opt out of seeing sponsored content? An actually functioning anti-harassment tool? Some improvement on whatever the hell “Moments” is supposed to be? Hahaha, no. It’s the ability to retweet yourself.
https://twitter.com/MilesKlee/status/742428185057329152
That’s right: One of the two people to retweet that tweet was me—the guy who tweeted it. I RT’d just in case some bozo follower wasn’t keeping close tabs on my timeline and needed a second chance to engage with my content. Sure, with old Twitter I could have tweet-quoted myself, like so:
https://twitter.com/MilesKlee/status/742768910269710336
But the self-RT is so sleek, so efficient, so futuristic. And if you already have a mountain of evergreen tweets in your history, so much the better for your personal brand, which will never grow stale as you endlessly recycle it. Welcome to the fountain of youth, bitches. Splash around, why don’t ya?
https://twitter.com/911VICTIM/status/742760265104523264
https://twitter.com/8BitRamen/status/742764177421422592
https://twitter.com/ItsTonyNow/status/742759387597524992
https://twitter.com/birthday__girl/status/742762785872982016
https://twitter.com/Cryptoterra/status/742760138755313664
https://twitter.com/walkthemunoz/status/742759978390282240
tom haverford voice: retweet yo self
— bails (@baytato) June 14, 2016
https://twitter.com/ASAPcourt/status/742771952411107329
https://twitter.com/ByeAshy/status/742766500541562880
you can retweet yourself.. i can officially unfollow everyone because my tweets are all i need
— lindsay (@lindsaydemeola) June 14, 2016
But before you go on a self-retweeting rampage, remember: There’s a right and a wrong (and an even wronger) way to do this. Don’t fuck it up!
I can't wait to unfollow everyone who self retweets unironically
— rachel (@rachelmillman) June 14, 2016
https://twitter.com/Ethan_Booker/status/742760717678456832
I'm now gonna retweet every tweet I've ever made. But just like jokingly lol
— necromanced krabman (@SquidDad) June 14, 2016
https://twitter.com/russbengtson/status/742755946821210113
I only retweet myself figuratively
— Brandy Jensen (@BrandyLJensen) June 14, 2016
And, naturally, there are some solid arguments for never self-RT’ing.
https://twitter.com/bn2b/status/742761843316412417
https://twitter.com/Swell_Bro/status/742763887435485184
So, like, we're not actually going to retweet our own tweets, right?
— Ariel Dumas (@ArielDumas) June 14, 2016
God help us if Trump ever finds out that he can retweet himself.
— Chris Olivieri (@ChrisDAPS) June 14, 2016
Normal People: I love to RT myself
— chris (@ElMeIloi) June 14, 2016
Me: That's not good
If you find yourself bewildered by all the nuances of this exciting new phase in the age of social media anxiety, however—or, God forbid, actually taking a side in the argument over it—just remember: Nobody actually cares.
USERS: we love twitter but it has problems
— actioncookbook (@actioncookbook) January 5, 2016
TWITTER: great we'll fix them
USERS: do you want to know what they are
TWITTER: absolutely not