do not poop sign

Photo via Tinieder/Getty Images (Licensed)

Just ask this woman whose house smells like 'pure death.'

In today’s edition of “thank god my life isn’t like this,” a woman is seeking advice after her husband’s best friend left a box of feces in their house. Don’t worry, though, it was a prank!

The woman explains to r/relationships on Reddit that her husband and his friend have been engaged in an ever-escalating prank war for years, and that it finally came to a head when the couple returned from their honeymoon. “My friends were really sweet and decorated our apartment for us as a 'welcome home' surprise... but when we got home yesterday, the first thing we noticed wasn't the beautiful decorations my friends had put up for us,” wrote user cici456. “It was a disgusting stench that reeked of pure death.”

The smell was coming from a box on the table, left by, surprise, her husband’s friend. “When Kevin tried to pick it up, what looked like five pounds of shit ripped through the cardboard and all over our table, upholstered chairs, and carpet. The card that was enclosed said, ‘GOT YOU BACK BRO!’ and some stupid website.” 

The couple is now staying at a hotel while their house is being cleaned. Despite all this, cici456 says her husband is still trying to defend his friend, calling his actions—you guessed it—a prank.

There are multiple websites that specialize in sending poop to someone as a prank, including Shitsenders, Shitexpress, and I Poop You. “We will send your friend or enemy a healthy helping of some of the nastiest, stinkiest, fresh shit packages you have ever seen,” writes Shitsenders. “We have several varieties of shit that we can send, including a special shit of the month.” A box costs as low as $15.95, plus shipping.

Lots of commenters agree that this is a bridge too far to mend, and that even if leaving a box of shit for your friend seems like a good prank to you, the prank war is between the two friends and shouldn’t affect his wife. However, others accuse cici456 of trying to “change” her husband, and not being able to take a joke. That joke being that her house is now covered in feces.

Hazing rituals, the Jackass movies, the existence of sites like Shitsenders, and the pursuit of YouTube clicks have swirled together to make the concept of a “prank” increasingly more violent. In 2014, popular YouTube “prankster” Sam Pepper faced multiple allegations of sexual assault after “pranking” women by grabbing their butts. Earlier this year, Brad Holmes surprised his girlfriend by covering her tampon in chili pepper. And recently, Vitallii Sediuk defended himself against lifting up model Gigi Hadid and trying to kiss Kim Kardashian’s butt by saying the actions were a protest and a prank.

This is something women have heard often—"Just relax, it’s just a joke, why are you taking everything so seriously?"—and while they’re busy trying to be cool and accommodating, their houses get covered in shit. Anyway, don’t send a box of shit to someone if you want to keep being their friend.

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