Comedian Tracy Morgan is a Twitter expert. In fact, if you ask him, he’s the reason the site exists.
“Twitter was something I invented in 1985,” Morgan said in an interview with the Shorty Awards, a Sawhorse Media event that celebrates the best in social media. “I needed a way to reach Ronald Reagan to let him know how the fuck I felt about him, but he wasn’t calling me back.”
In the video—seen on YouTube by over 7,000 people since its release Sunday afternoon—Morgan riffed on the wonders of the Internet (“If I wanted to right now, I could look at pornography on my phone”), hashtags (“I love hashtags. I love all of ’em! Democratic, Republicans, black, white, hispanics. What’s a hashtag?”), and the popularity of Foursquare (“Why would I want to do that? What if somebody wanted to murder me? That’s what Lincoln did wrong. Everybody knew he was at that play. So J Booth was like…”)
The comedian sounded equally prophetic and technologically pathetic each time he opened his mouth to answer a question.
“I feel like I don’t get enough credit on Twitter,” Morgan lamented while speaking about the role the site played in the Arab Spring Movement. “Because I tweeted Egypt and I said, ‘If you don’t like Saddam [Hussein], kick the motherfucker out!”
Morgan also took the time to announce his plans for the rest of 2012: more episodes of 30 Rock and a standup comedy tour through the United States and Canada. He also intends to build a time machine:
“I want to travel to Planet of the Apes. I want to see Dr. Zaius. You remember that time on the beach when Zira said to Dr. Zaius, ‘What do you think you’ll find out there, Doctor?’ And Dr. Zaius said, ‘His destiny.’ That’s why I want to visit.”
Wait, but Tracy, you forgot to tell us what you think about Twitter!
“Tracy Morgan needs more than 140 characters to express himself.”
More of Morgan’s infinite microblogging wisdom can be absorbed by watching the video below.