Google wants to patent the word 'Glass'

All sizes | Glass Across the Country 28495 | Flickr - Photo Sharing!
It has to stop. 

Added to the list of ridiculous things Google does that surprise no one, the company has tried and failed to register ‘"Glass" as a trademark, according to The Wall Street Journal. You read that correctly, Google tried to register "Glass," not "Google Glass," which it has already trademarked.

The U.S. Patent and Trademark Office declined Google’s request, stating that Google trademarking ‘"Glass" could create consumer confusion, the term "Glass" is “merely descriptive,” and that generic terms can’t be trademarked under federal law.

Google in turn sent a 1,928 page letter to the Trademark Office in defense of its claim that "Glass" would not confuse consumers, disregarding thousands of years of human history in the process, while explaining to the Trademark Office that, “the frame and display components of the Glass device do not consist of glass at all.”

If Google succeeds in registering "Glass" as a trademark, the floodgates will open for a flotilla of egotistic companies to stake claims to words like "Phone" (Apple) or "Windows," (Microsoft). Because nothing will ever go wrong if the English language is for sale.

I for one would love to live in a world where the phrase "glass window" alluded to a unlocked pair of Google Glass running Windows OS. And not... you know... a glass window. Like, that you look out. 

Photo via tedeytan/Flickr (CC BY-SA 2.0)

google glass
If you're wearing Google Glass, I can't have sex with you
Remember the simpler days when the unsexiest thing a guy could carry around with him was his beeper? Unless he’s a doctor or otherwise on call to save lives, seeing a guy carrying a beeper in 2014 is a sign that there might be something seriously wrong with him, like that he’s a chronic masturbator or lives in a house made of human hair. Studies have shown that iPhone users get laid more than any other technological subgroup, and beeper people have got to be near bottom of...
From Our VICE Partners

Pure, uncut internet. Straight to your inbox.

Thanks for subscribing to our newsletter!