Cory Booker, eat your heart out.
Rory Patrick's journey is what modern day Twitter history is made of.
You can keep one person off TV, but you can't stop the Internet from freaking out.
So Sad Today is the most genuine person on Twitter.
The good side of the Internet shines again.
You better have a trash can handy while you read this, 'cause you'll probably want to puke.