The Daily Dot The Kernel

Topics

Site

comics

Life at lightspeed

It’s been almost five years since he left, and Josh Miller happily realizes everyone he ever knew is most likely dead. He can finally return home.

Having grown tired of his pathetic friends and family back on Earth, Josh decided to take advantage of the dilation of time created by traveling at (close to) the speed of light, enabling him to easily outlive anyone he had ever met.

For each year he experienced traveling on his ship, 22 years will have occurred for everyone living on Earth, so over a century has now passed for everyone else but him… and he’ll land back on Earth still a young man, unencumbered with any ties to the past, eager to start anew.

Once he gets home he’ll have a quick crash course to get up to speed on what happened in the past century, maybe make a snack, and then get right to work creating a new circle of family and friends that hopefully won’t be as disappointing as the last group he was saddled with.

And if they’re annoying too, it’s not a huge deal… he’ll just blast off for another five years and try again.

(Starring Josh Miller of computer-gaze.tumblr.com!)

Top Stories

rogue one star wars celebration How the Lucasfilm Story Group controls every corner of the 'Star Wars' franchise
Star Wars Celebration lifted the veil on the team of masterminds behind the new 'Star Wars' franchise.
Microphone on stage At the RNC, Muslim comedians laugh through the Trump era
'This has been a difficult year, a difficult decade. Sometimes all you can do is laugh.'
trump hats on a desk For the RNC's swag merchants, politics is second to profit
'I'm a capitalist. That's it. There's where I'm at.'

The Daily Dot Bazaar

Disney Infinity Marvel The Disney Infinity Marvel starter kit is 69 percent off today
Join the Disney Infinity craze without spending a fortune.
BACtrack The BACtrack pocket breathalyzer helps prevent drunken disasters
Know your limits in the most accurate way possible.
Best Buy Best Buy is having Black Friday in July: Here are the top deals
Apologies if your bank account just healed from Prime Day.
stargate Stargate fans can get the complete series for 57 percent off, today only
Undomesticated equines could not remove us from taking advantage of this deal.
AI bundle Master AI and jumpstart your tech career with this 10-course bundle
Dive into machine learning, the technology behind countless next-generation apps.
besvia headphone sale Save 74 percent on noise-cancelling earbuds by Besiva
Enjoy uninterrupted music without ruining your hearing.
geeky dorm gear 15 geeky dorm accessories to brighten your tiny room
Everyone knows the best part of moving is decorating.