Catalog Living offers a glimpse inside the lives of the people inhabiting your home furnishing catalogs. Who keeps jars of starfish in their bathroom? Who uses stacks of color-coordinated books as a bedside table? The answer is Gary and Elaine, the unseen and often clueless couple who live their lives according to the gospel of Pottery Barn and Crate & Barrel. There is now a Catalog Living book, Catalog Living at Its Most Absurd: Decorating Takes Wicker Balls.
Gary, I'm not sure how me saying "put the limes out" translates to "give the limes bunny ears and put them in a rock sculpture."
Gary and Elaine's visitors would be angrier about their guest room being outside if they weren't so preoccupied with trying to figure out what the light fixture was wired to.
Frankly Gary, I've been so busy I'm amazed I've found the time to keep our twine spool jar full.
It wasn't until after the party that Gary and Elaine realized their guests may have stayed away from the bar because they were intimidated by the garnish.
The wicker ball peered into the mirror, wondering where the time had gone and how life’s path had led him away from his childhood dream of becoming patio furniture.
Although Gary and Elaine were pleased to be conserving water with their new artificial lawn, they regretted the side effect of it attracting artificial wildlife.
I'm not kidding, Gary, this kiwi is so tart I'm going to have to take off my necklace to eat it.
I don't know when you're going to learn your lesson, Gary. Every year you buy the pillow a toy, and every year he just ignores it.
Gary was always amazed how Elaine could so clearly say "I don't care about your sailboat sculpture collection" with just a few pairs of sunglasses.
It seems a little unfair to give only two of the dogs candy in their stocking, Elaine. And while we're on the topic, it may also be a little unfair to have given only two of them names.